I’ve shared on occasions that I deal with anxiety, depression and low self-esteem. Sadly, I think that most women would raise their hand and say that sounds like them if they were being completely honest. Or if not, maybe they suffer in silence, trying to figure out how to make a change, or maybe they feel overwhelmed and get frustrated because they just don’t understand how to make positives changes. Trust me, I feel you.
I would tell myself that I would feel better if I could just get myself to a yoga class a couple times a week. While going to yoga would certainly help and make me feel great, how do I get from my house to yoga? Why wasn’t I already in a rhythm of doing things that make me feel better, be better etc. if I already knew what I needed to do?
The answer is that I wasn’t practicing self love.
What the heck is self-love?
Self love is CHOOSING in every moment to love yourself. It’s about letting go of the feelings of overwhelm and forgiving yourself. Accepting that not everything has to be perfect. It’s about giving yourself grace! Have you ever noticed the things you say to yourself? Or think to yourself?
Low self-esteem and feelings of not being enough come from not being kind to yourself, which continues the cycle of negative self talk. The good news is this can all end with self-love.
Take action
So maybe you’ve heard of self love or self-care, but never quite knew what the actions looked like. How do I take care of myself first? How did I improve my self-esteem? You may very well already have the solution to some of these, but may want more help on figuring it all out.
The key for me was figuring out the tools that I needed to get me from A to B. I knew it was the mindset, the action that I had a hard time with. Until, I finally had an epiphany and decided that I was going around in circles constantly trying to figure out how to do the same thing over and over again, while getting the same results but hoping it would magically turn out differently.
Sound familiar? Maybe it’s getting a health plan going, starting your own business, or taking a leap of faith and venturing out for a different career or job or maybe your love life doesn’t look so great. Not having the action items for self-love can hold you back.
So why am I writing about this?
Because I am passionate about the truth that living your best possible life is a real thing. It’s not just what happens to celebrities or people with oodles of cash, it’s for everyone. And self love is one of the tools that I have discovered since my new year’s resolution was to face the fears in my life, which all stemmed from low self-confidence and negative self talk. You can read more about the start of my journey here.
Through the process of facing my fears I discovered that low self-esteem is actually what was holding me back from putting action to my dreams, I have found many tools to help me along the way. I was surprised by how helpful and instantaneous these tools were once I started to put them into action. I have also been overjoyed to find so many people out in the world that are dedicated to helping people learn these tools.
Toolbox…get em ladies!
Some of the tools that I have found to be helpful have been using affirmations and meditation. I’ve never been a fan of affirmations, I used to think they were silly and meditation….let’s just say I drink coffee and I hate sitting still, so I had a negative outlook on meditation. I figured I wasn’t a monk so it probably wouldn’t work out for me. ←- p.s That’s negative self talk!
BUT, I was surprised to find some great modern tools that helped to teach me self-love. First there are a couple of people who I would suggest subscribing to their newsletter and or following them on FB to get as much helpful free stuff and to see what else might work out for you.
People
Niyc Pidgeon, is a positive psychologist who I first became aware of while listening to a podcast. It was so nice to hear that no matter what, everyone struggles with self-doubt and self-esteem. It’s not like some people are just immune to it and never have to deal…we all do on some scale at some point, and Niyc pointed that out and talked about the tools that she uses to change her outlook and how to help other people. I immediately wanted to know more about her and the tools that she uses.
Christine Arylo, is a best selling author and has made it her mission to teach self-love to everyone who seeks to learn more and is a firm believer that the most important person you have a relationship with is yourself. She has a great community and focuses on teaching’s on 10 key branches to self-worth. She has inspired me to share these tools with you, check her out.
Apps
ThinkUp – This app is UH-MAZING for using affirmations daily. I knew I didn’t really want to put a bunch of sticky notes on my bathroom or closet mirrors, so this is perfect. It guides you through choosing 5 different affirmations that you want to work on, then you record your own voice and it plays on a loop with soft music in the background. Apparently your subconscious trusts your voice over a stranger’s voice, so it’s better. Isn’t science fascinating??
I will admit though, the first couple times I listened to my own voice, I couldn’t stop laughing and feeling embarrassed. I play the app when I’m in the shower and when I’m doing my hair and makeup. I have been using this for the past two weeks and I have to say, I really feel the difference in my mood and outlook everyday. I feel more confident and I LOVE IT!
HeadSpace– I just started using this app for meditation. It has a cute intro video that walks you through everything and tells you exactly what to expect from the meditation. And don’t worry it’s only ten minutes long. You can totally do it!
I hope that you take a moment to check out these tools for self-love. They will help you to become more patient, kind, relaxed, focused and confident so you can go after your goals with no hesitation.
With love and Splendor,
cristin
I have to say this is one of the most emotional (In a positive way) things I've read for a long time. I'm so happy I can read something REAL , that entices me to keep going … Thank you !